Monday, October 15, 2018

pregnancy + infant loss remembrance day.

in the late eighties, president ronald reagan proclaimed the month of october as national pregnancy and infant loss awareness month. in the mid-2000s, october 15th became pregnancy and infant loss remembrance day. if you've experience this type of loss, you don't need a day to be reminded of such a thing. the loss is forever woven into my life, and i will never, ever forget.

three months later, there are still little reminders of our baby. we would have found out the gender of our baby this month. i found my maternity leggings while i was unpacking last month. knowing my arms will be empty come next spring. and several other reminders that come out of nowhere and sting all over again. i assumed they would fade over time, but i know now that i will always carry it with me.

when i'm ready, i will give our baby a name. not for closure- that will never happen- but because there was a life growing inside of me, if only for nine weeks. naming the baby acknowledges that short life. and though that life never lived outside of my womb, it was still a life.

i remember growing up and knowing that my mom had experienced a miscarriage before she had my brother + i. her loss, that pain - it never truly became real until the moment i called her to tell her that i had miscarried my own baby. she wept with me over the phone and told me how it brought up the painful memory all over again. it's something she's carried with her for over three decades. i know i will, too.

the only comfort in this process has been Jesus. He will be the only comfort going forward. if you have experienced a loss, know that you are not alone. the Great Comforter is holding you in His arms. He provides peace that surpasses all understanding

the weekly: october 8th - 14th.

  S N A P S H O T S  

-  saw these pretties on my evening walk.  
-  slow mornings with a sweet cuddle bug.
-  he's growing so fast.
-  sunset.

   M O M E N T S  +  H A P P E N I N G S    

-  i made a cleaning spray with my thieves sample that came with my YL starter kit. i was skeptical of it, to be honest. but - yet again - it surprised me. the top of our stove is sparkling clean now! i also cleaned our bathroom with it, too.

-  jared worked a split shift on thursday and friday, which meant we got to drink coffee together before i left for work.

-  the october deadline for taxes is next week, so i was insanely busy at work this week. i clocked in several hours on saturday to help out. it reminded me that in a few months, i'll be working sixty hours each week during tax season, and... dang- that got depressing real quick.

-  it snowed on sunday night. in october. what the heck?!

   L E S S O N S   +  R E A L I Z A T I O N S   

-  jared + i were reflecting on how jackson is growing so fast. we thought of the times we would wish for the next season, the next milestone - only to miss the current phase once it was gone. 

-  i have really enjoyed finding new recipes to make for dinner during the week!

-  i picked jackson up on thursday because of jared's shift, and it reminded me of when i did that every work day during second shift.  

  P R E V I O U S L Y  on  W I L D B L O O M  

+  2017:  powersheets check-in Q2 + Q3  //  currently: october
+  2016:  coffee date
+  2014:  iphoneography
+  2013:  tidbits of life  //  instagram

Monday, October 8, 2018

the weekly: october 1st - 7th.

  S N A P S H O T S  

-  breakfast at one of our favorite local spots.   
-  my pumpkin.
-  i love those two. 
-  hello, october.

   M O M E N T S  +  H A P P E N I N G S    

-  jackson can now climb on the couch, so that's fun.

-  the boys + i had breakfast at the reverie on friday morning.

-  we took jackson to the pumpkin patch on saturday. it was chilly outside, and we had a blast!

-  i finished the book, i'd rather be reading. so delightful + nostalgic.

-  jared + i had a sushi date followed by grocery shopping. i know, i know- our saturday nights are so wild.

-  i randomly bought some perfect bars at the grocery store, and good grief- they are SO good.

-  movies watched:  hotel transylvania. (5/5)  //  the darkest minds. (3/5)  //  the new purge movie. (3/5)   

   L E S S O N S   +  R E A L I Z A T I O N S   

-  follow the arrows. i'm often so focused on getting answers that i miss the arrows that are pointing me in the direction i should go.

-  we celebrated the life of jared's grandma on friday. the service was beautiful. what i gleaned the most is- when we get together for family functions (birthdays, holidays, etc.)- it matters to someone. the memories shared of grandma fern were mostly from when everyone got together, even if it was just for a game of scrabble. these moments matter. i want to be more intentional with those times with the people i love because it matters to someone.

-  i was feeling very discouraged about my little side business this week. when people are snarky about things i love, i feel strongly about it. but- people are entitled to their own opinions, as am i. and then i had someone tell me that the oils i gave them have helped them tremendously, and that was all i needed to kick the negativity. 

  P R E V I O U S L Y  on  W I L D B L O O M  

+  2016:  a happy list from today  //  luke's diner  //  friday favs
+  2013:  what teaching sunday school has taught me  //  currently

Friday, October 5, 2018

friday links.

+  i made abby's taco soup this week, and it's my new favorite recipe. the flavors are just divine.

+  two years ago today, i left the house before the sun came up to have a latte at luke's diner

+  michelle shared a list of 2018's most frightening halloween costumes. I'M DEAD.

+  i'm thinking about getting this diffuser for jackson's bedroom.

+  i binged the dr. death podcast recently. if you are a fan of dirty john, listen to this!

Monday, October 1, 2018

the weekly: september 24th - 30th.

  S N A P S H O T S  

-  saturday planning.   
-  my new oils!
-  good grief, he's cute. 
-  a kid-free lunch + grocery shopping on sunday.

   M O M E N T S  +  H A P P E N I N G S    

-  jackson loves playing with the bubbles in the bathtub. he now says "buba" for bubbles.

-  jared's grandma went to be with Jesus this week. we are sad, but we know she is whole + healed now.

-  the new season of the blacklist is on netflix, so i've been getting less sleep.

-  jared really wanted to go to the renaissance fair. i did not. but it ended up being somewhat fun.

-  we walked around the mall on friday night with my sister-in-law + her family. so simple, but so fun.  

   L E S S O N S   +  R E A L I Z A T I O N S   

-  "hold plans with open hands instead of closed fists"  emily p. freeman

-  we have the best support system. i already knew this, but i'm so grateful for our families.

-  i've had a lot of anxiety about starting my oils business. i was always super skeptical about them. i thought they were kinda woo-woo. and then i started using lavender after my miscarriage, and my mind slowly started to change. i finally bought the starter kit (after weeks of deciding if it was worth it) and quickly realized why they are beloved by others. i debated the business until jared told me that he noticed a difference in his sleep since i'd been applying a sleep blend. that was all it took for me to dive head-first. i might fail, but at least i tried!

  P R E V I O U S L Y  on  W I L D B L O O M  

+  2017:  three things you need to know.
+  2016:  tidbits of life  //  friday favorites  //  a month in review
+  2014:  fall to-do list  //  a month in review

Friday, September 28, 2018

currently // september 2018.

creating:  goals for october with my powersheets
cooking:  a lot lately. i'm not making extravagant meals, but i'm enjoying trying new things. i recently baked scones!
drinking:  lots of water + coffee. always coffee.
snacking:  trail mix. sweet potato chips. coconut milk caramel bites.
reading:   i'd rather be reading - anne bogel  +  educated - tara westover.     
listening:  struggle well project podcast  +  lauren daigle's new album because it's so dang good. 
watching:  the blacklist. this is us. fall tv is here!
wishing:  to quit my job + work from home. maybe open a small photography business + have another side gig.    
anticipating:  the weekend. this was a loooooong week.      
enjoying:  our home. it's just so wonderful.      
wondering:  if i should start selling oils. who even am i, you guys???
loving:  the cool, fall weather.  
hoping:  for the best. i'm taking steps for our future. they might not pan out, but that's okay.   
marveling:  at what the Lord has been doing in my life the past two weeks.    
needing:  a vacation. i don't necessarily need to go anywhere. just a week away from work will do. 
learning:  "hold plans with open hands instead of closed fists" emily p. freeman.
smelling:  stress away + lavender. [if you're curious about oils, follow along here.]
wearing:  these new shoes i got from target! they're so dang cute.
bookmarking:  blogging ideas.  
giggling:  at my crazy baby. sometimes he dances so hard that he falls down, and it's the best.   
feeling:  all the feels. happy. excited. nervous. anxious. but i think it's all positive, if that makes sense.

making me happy:  slow, rainy saturday mornings. hugs from jackson. coffee [always]. new dinosaur socks. fun conversation with another mom at target. maple donuts. writing + worship music. cozied up on the couch with a good book. a rainy week with perfect fall weather.

Monday, September 24, 2018

the weekly: sept 17 - sept 23.

  S N A P S H O T S  

-  fall is here!  
-  i just love him.
-  diffusing oils for my sickly baby. 
-  i've heard so many good things about this book.

   M O M E N T S  +  H A P P E N I N G S    

-  i bought my first cookbook. i needed something with simple recipes, and this seems like the perfect fit for now!

-  i got my young living starter kit in the mail! i also started a little insta account to learn + connect with other oily friends.

-  i received a jury duty summons. it's my first, and i think it's exciting. 

-  i took the day off on friday to go shopping with my mama! it was just like old times + exactly what i needed.

-  we ventured out to el dorado to camp on friday night. the weather - you guys - it was perfect.

   L E S S O N S   +  R E A L I Z A T I O N S   

-  He is near in our brokenness. during worship on wednesday night, i had an amazing moment. i can't quite describe it, but i won't forget it. ever. i've been struggling with a lot lately, and He covered me with His love.

-  on sunday, we woke up with a sickly baby. it made my mama heart so sad, but i wasn't mad about the extra cuddles.

  P R E V I O U S L Y  on  W I L D B L O O M  

+  2016:  friday favs  |  the best cookies ever  |  fall favorites  |  if i were a flavor of ice cream  |  a happy list  |  WB favs
+  2015:  currently: september.
+  2014:  a day in the life
+  2013:  the coming of fall  |  currently  |  a happy list